“You may encounter many defeats, but you must not be defeated. In fact, it may be necessary to encounter the defeats, so you can know who you are, what you can rise from, how you can still come out of it.”― Maya Angelou
Sometimes I get a glimpse of my life and am in AWE of whom I was and whom I’ve become. How did I get to this space? How did FOOD become a driving force in my life in a way that nourishes my mind, body and soul? How is my past and present relationship with food a driving force in my company as I empower people to shift their beliefs around food as well?
Food did not always play a positive role in my life. I was always OBSESSED with food, but in a way that was detrimental to my health and well-being. As a child it was way of exerting my power and a means to try and control a life that I viewed as having no control over. I refused to eat anything if it wasn’t processed or full of sugar.
As a teenager, it turned into a different OBSESSION as it felt as if food started to control ME. Although I was never diagnosed or treated specifically for an eating disorder, I think it’s safe to say that restricting calories, toying with binging and purging could be classified as some form of an eating disorder.
In my 20’s, it turned into disordered eating as my OBSESSION with food continued with every diet that was on the market to help shed those extra unwanted pounds. I always strived to eliminate the OBSESSION with food since it was consuming and frankly unbearable at times. I yearned for it to disappear; annoyed that we needed food to survive; wished there was something else to be OBSESSED with that didn’t lurk in every corner. It stopped me from truly living and it (for lack of a better word) SUCKED!
When I was 23 I started to view my health in a different light. I was going to be having an out-patient procedure to remove a cyst on my ovary which ended up being a lot more than the doctors and I bargained for. I was diagnosed with Borderline Ovarian Cancer. This surgery became the first of five surgeries I would receive over the course of 12 years to eradicate the cancer. Each surgery became a time of reflection which motivated me to better myself (of course after a good old fashion pity party).
My fifth surgery required the removal of my last standing ovary. At this time, I felt that I lost a battle that I was fighting, (to keep my ovaries healthy), but knew that another lesson had to be learned. It was at this juncture in my life that I started working with a health coach and was ready to make drastic changes to shift my beliefs around food. With this shift, the diet craze seized, the weight came off, my burdens became lighter and I started to feel that I was on the right path in so many areas of my life. Fueling my body with the proper nutrients allowed me to work towards living the life I had been striving for, for too long. My road towards overall health and well-being was a very bumpy road at times, but I am so grateful for how I got “here”.
So, what I thought I wanted didn’t happen for me. Something greater happened! You see, I am still OBSESSED with food, but in a way that feeds every part of me. My thoughts and lifestyle around food nourishes me in all areas of my life. My challenges have become my greatest gifts!
Yes, I think about food daily. Yes, I always have it on my mind. Yes, I am always eating or preparing it. Yes, food is a driving force in my life and it allows me to be a YES in so many different areas of my life.
I used to dream of the day that I didn’t have to think about food anymore. When my belief and relationship towards food shifted, my OBSESSION around food came from a LOVING SPACE. I am in awe that when I now think of food, it is with a warm, open and loving heart. I use food to nurture and nourish myself and my loved ones. I didn’t know that I would soon appreciate all of its amazing benefits and qualities, which in turn allowed me to do the same for myself.
I understand the importance of food. I understand that it could either be my medicine or my poison. I understand that it is an essential tool for living a life filled with love, joy and happiness. I understand that it nurtures me in a way that I never dreamed possible. I understand that my current OBSESSION with food is what makes me thrive and I’m so glad I’M HERE!
Contributor/Autor Bio: Meet Pam Yudko
Pam Yudko is Holistic Transformational and Health Coach who guides busy people to lose weight, double their energy so that they can do it all and do it well. She tailors programs specifically geared to meet her client’s health goals without deprivation or guilt. To learn more about turning your obsession with food into one that serves, nurtures, calms and energizes you check out www.wholefullyaware.com.
Learn more about Pam on her Positive Attitude Bio Page
Follow Pam socially: